Striking an active balance

  • Published
  • By Lt. Col. Matthew Orlowsky
  • Commander, 436th Force Support Squadron
DOVER AIR FORCE BASE, Del. --  "Can I play on electronics?" the chorus rings out from our three kids.

Our oldest, a 10-year-old, leads the lobbying effort.

"Dad, I need to relax. School and chores are stressful."

No doubt health class, news reports and conversations he's been surrounded by have informed his opinion that stress is bad. While I don't disagree that stress needs to be tamed and managed; it doesn't need to be feared. I do fear that my son would only passively fritter away the hours building in Minecraft or paving his path to the Super Bowl in Madden 13. Instead, I urge him to strike a meaningful, active balance among his priorities.

This is a challenge for us all in the Air Force when there seems to be an endless list beyond Minecraft and Madden. Life demands an active balance and the Air Force encourages and rewards the same.

Balance what? Well, that's up to you to a large degree. Regardless of your priorities, we should know what the Air Force expects us to balance. It's what we recognize on our award nominations, the 1206 and our annual reports: the EPR/OPR. Supervisors reward individuals who do their job and do it well, who are involved and lead within the community, and make themselves better. Our performance reports reflect how well we personally grow and foster growth in others, how we support the community, and how we execute our training and education in addition to our primary duties. Despite this, balance can easily fall by the wayside given how work can appear more urgent and "more necessary" than other pursuits. The challenge for us all is to strike an active balance amongst the myriad of requirements and demands.

By active balance I mean assigning time to what matters to you--your priorities. Think of it as an athlete might. An athlete's training regime always balances stress and recovery. The athlete, say a football player, on the real road to the Super Bowl neither fears the repetitions for his position nor the time after the game to recuperate with ice or similar treatments. Neither the stress of exercise reps nor the recovery can be neglected; both are needed for sustained performance.

This is as important to the team as it is to the individual. Just as the coach carves in time for the team to recover, how do we as leaders make time for "recovery?" Do we use the morale programs and resources available to us, or even create the environment where our team can pursue their regeneration, whether it is with "gym time" or an occasional out-of-the-ordinary section stop at the climbing wall, driving range or bowling game?

In and amongst our priorities, know which ones need tending. We juggle any number of priorities at any one time. Let's carry the "juggling" metaphor one more step with a story I've heard from a mentor. Our priorities are objects you actively work to keep aloft. However, priorities have varying urgency, importance depending on the time. Some are glass, some wood and still others rubber. If we're not using or maintaining them in the air, we could be set for a thud or a crash. Our "glass" prioritized objects are the most critical--mishandling due to timing and focus leads to a catastrophic crash. Others priorities are wooden. Here, a drop could result in an unwelcome, attention-grabbing thud. Finally, your rubber objects will bounce with a miss, but neglect them too long and they lose momentum to come back to you. Make time for everything you prioritize, even if it's just a few minutes to say, "We haven't forgotten."

One priority shouldn't be at the expense of the other. This balance is where it truly becomes active. When are you due for a silent, spiritual reflection, a date night or outing to strengthen your anchor relationships? As we seek our balance, think how we use our free time and the state of our priorities. Our free time is the most valuable and should be assigned to the things important to us. This quite simply is living with integrity - living out our values.

Just as the Air Force expects balance, it does give us a framework to evaluate balance. Comprehensive Airmen Fitness is a model that rests on four pillars: mental, physical, social and spiritual. These "pillars" are perspectives on our lives which capture the totality of how we experience and relate to others and ourselves. Tending to priorities in these diverse areas could yield personal dividends in decision making, adaptability, positive thinking, endurance, communication, perspective and purpose derived from our valued priorities. Further, strength training in any of these "pillars" creates stability when life forces us out of balance.

The next time my son and I volley on "stressful" chores, I will share that stress can be both positive and negative; it can enhance and deteriorate performance. With too little stress, a person is bored and strength atrophies. With too much unmitigated stress, a person is overwhelmed. An active balance of priorities poises us for that optimal place in between, and ultimately to perform well at home, in the community or in uniform.

An active balance is what's expected and rewarded. It is its own reward. It is ours to tailor in line with our priorities. It will yield dividends for our lives. Most importantly, it's our vehicle to living with integrity first- living out our values.

Our limited free time is the most valuable and should be assigned to the things important to us. The next time my son and I "stress" over chores, I may concede that I should put down my work "electronics," pick up the other controller and strengthen our tie as well.